Patterning Discipline

Stand at ease, attention. The army way, is it that easy to train our kids our way. I used the word train with respect to discipline as nowadays parents try to train their kids with respect to their expectations.  It may seem easier but in the long run these harsh measures hurt the most. Kids are like soft clay and must be carefully molded with reverence to their nature, age and behavioral pattern.

Every parenting is unique as every child is unique hence it’s difficult to pin point the particular reasons. But here we can discuss few obvious reasons to sustain child’s behavioral pattern.

The ideas are not just for toddlers but are particularly relevant in giving insight and advice for dealing with common toddler problems such as dealing with tantrums, bedtime and constantly saying no to every request. You need to see things from your toddler’s point of view and explain ourselves that we often measure a toddler's behavior by adult standards when we haven't reached the milestones, so that they can meet these standards.

Here are few alarming Behavioral distress when noticed must be stopped:

1. Throwing tantrums to get the things done.
2. Stubborn head
3. Crying unnecessarily to gain sympathy
4.  Temper Tantrums

Parenting is an Art that is yet to be perfected by anyone. Long time parents must suggest you their experiences, but the uniqueness of your bond with your child makes every parenting unique in itself. Many Child psychologist and observers have gathered and generalized few ideas and hence there are good books available to guide new parents or troubled parents. Below is the list of few finest parenting books to manage child behavior:

1. Positive Discipline, by Jane Nelson is a modern day bible on disciplining kids.
2. Setting Limits with your Strong Willed Child, by Robert J. Mckenzie
3. The Smart Love Parent: The Compassionate Alternative to Discipline, Martha Heinman, William J. Pieper
4. Discipline without distress: 135 tools for raising caring, responsible children without time –out, spanking, punishment or bribery, by Judy Arnall

You cannot Start or Stop behavior of a child with the touch of a button. Being a parent it’s your duty to give a thought into cultivating the best out of the stimulating energy of your child. They are full of energy hence it is necessary to channelize it in the best possible way. Here are few positive ideas to help control the behavior of the child or must say ideas to channelize their energy for the best. Understand their psychology

Though great ideas come with experiences but one of the sort after is getting a handy book for such occasions. Like The Everything Toddler activities Book: Games and Projects that Entertain and Educate, by Joni Levine

Toddlers are limited in their ability to communicate, hence must be patiently heard as they often express themselves by crying, jabbering or with pointing. They will test your patience with their clumsy and awkward gestures. And one of the most annoying aspects could be their inability to share, Mine and No are their favorite words, but you have to understand it ain’t unique to your child.

Redirecting is one technique which when used can be really effective, like if the child is throwing or patting blocks or toys, take them away while saying that ‘ that the blocks are to build”, and substitute it with another appropriate toy like a ball and ask him to throw it in the basket. By redirecting the activity, you channel the child’s more problem activity into an acceptable activity.

It’s important to provide children with opportunity to vent their emotions. They hold up their emotions in public and at school which takes a great deal out of them and hence giving then opportunity to surpass these test and come to you gives them a relief.

Toddlers are not the most empathic ones and hence it’s important for you to as a parent to make them understand how you feel. They may take a while to understand but it’s important for them to review the situation and behave. Over the course of they start understanding more actively.

And most importantly never let the child get away with wrong deeds. They may not have best of the days and expects you to understand, and parents must cut them a slack at times, but don’t let them take advantage of you. Every parent has a bag full of discipline tricks, hence show them as much as you know where it is coming from, them must understand that there are consequences for their actions.

Disciplining is little like juggling, the trickier you get - the better it pays off.